Sunday, October 2, 2011

God, I've Got a Question by James Merritt

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It is time for a FIRST Wild Card Tour book review! If you wish to join the FIRST blog alliance, just click the button. We are a group of reviewers who tour Christian books. A Wild Card post includes a brief bio of the author and a full chapter from each book toured. The reason it is called a FIRST Wild Card Tour is that you never know if the book will be fiction, non~fiction, for young, or for old...or for somewhere in between! Enjoy your free peek into the book!

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Today's Wild Card author is:


and the book:


God, I've Got a Question

Harvest House Publishers (October 1, 2011)

***Special thanks to Karri James | Marketing Assistant, Harvest House Publishers for sending me a review copy.***

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:


James Merritt (PhD) is a pastor, author, and host of the Touching Lives television program, seen nationwide and in 122 countries. Previously, he served as a two-term president of America's largest Christian denomination. As a national voice on faith and leadership, Merritt has been interviewed by outlets including Time, Fox News, and 60 Minutes. He resides with his family outside Atlanta, GA.

Visit the author's website.

SHORT BOOK DESCRIPTION:




James Merritt, popular pastor, author, and host of the television show Touching Lives, knows that when people wrestle with doubts, they are missing out on the security, promises, and power of Christ.

Avoiding academic lingo, Merritt presents relatable, relevant responses to the hard questions that seekers and Christians hesitate to ask or answer:

Why is there so much suffering in the world if God is in control
How can I discover God’s will for my life?
Why is Jesus the only way to God, and how can I defend this?
What should I do about the moral gray areas of my life?
Why should anybody believe the Bible?
Whether read straight through or used as a reference for specific topics, this insightful resource reveals the uncompromised truths of the Christian faith and the depth and importance of its precepts for every person, every life.






Product Details:

List Price: $12.99
Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers (October 1, 2011)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0736940014
ISBN-13: 978-0736940016

AND NOW...THE FIRST CHAPTER:


God, Is the Bible
Really Your Word?



I am not sure how Bart found our church, but I’m glad he did. Bart is a skeptic by nature and had wandered into our church with a pocketful of questions about God, Christianity, faith, Jesus, and the church. I love apologetics, and I would rather witness to the “convert me if you can, buddy” type than the “I am so ready to become a Christian, where do I sign?” type. (You can occasionally find the latter, though more rarely as our culture becomes more secular.) Bart was just what I wanted.

When I was informed of his interest, I set up an appointment to go to his house hoping to build a bridge to his heart. He intrigued me from the beginning. Bart reminded me of the rich young ruler, except he was anything but rich. A graduate of   The Citadel, his military background and training was evident from his firm handshake, confident demeanor, and his look-you-in-the-eye attentiveness. He was flanked by his family—a sweet wife who longed for Bart to come to faith and beautiful children. As I found out more about his background, I was warmly drawn to the military code of honor ingrained in his DNA.

No small talk for Bart. He got right to the point as he began firing questions at me as if I were the target and his tongue were an AK-47. “Why are you a Christian? What is it about Jesus that is so different? How can I ever believe?” It became obvious quickly that the “God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life” approach would get about as far as Rush Limbaugh at an ACLU convention.

That night has now turned into a two-year conversation built around breakfasts, lunches, office meetings, and discussions about books I have given him by authors ranging from Lee Strobel to Josh McDowell. Frankly, it has been both frustrating and exhilarating. Sometimes it has been “three steps forward and two steps back”; at other times it has been “two steps back, forget forward.”

The most enlightening meeting we had was our third one at a Cracker Barrel not far from our church. (I am convinced that the one place you can always feel the presence of the Holy Spirit, besides the church, is a Cracker Barrel.) I had moved Bart from atheism to agnosticism fairly early by admitting that no one can either prove or disprove the existence of God. He readily grasped the fact that taking an “I don’t know whether God exists or not” position is far more defensible than claiming an “I know for sure there is no God” approach that is possible only with perfect omniscience. Allowing for the possibility of a God enabled us to make progress on the spiritual track we were on together.

As we waited on our breakfasts, we began the same procedure of circling each other like two boxers in the first round of a major title fight—neither wanted the other to land the first blow, and both wanted to avoid the dreaded knockdown.

“Bart,” I began, “contrary to most philosophers, the most important question about God is not ‘Is there a God?’ ” That is what the infamous Dr. Lofton said that day in class and what most people assume is the question about any supreme being.

“It’s not,” Bart said with eyes wide and eyebrows arched.

“No.” I allowed a pause to get heavily pregnant before I continued. “The most important question about God is this: ‘If there is a God, has that God spoken?’ Bart, let’s assume that there is a God. Let’s retire for the time being any atheistic or agnostic thoughts. I know that’s a big jump for you, but humor me for a moment.”

Bart shifted uncomfortably in his seat and reluctantly agreed to my scenario. I then took my AK-47 and began my rapid-fire salvo.

“Does this God have a name? Does He know me? Does He care for me? Does He have a plan for my life? Can I have a relationship with Him? If so, how? What does He consider right and wrong? Is there life after death? Can I have a relationship with Him that transcends time and space? How can I live in such a way that pleases Him and keeps me on His good side? Why did He put me here?”

As our breakfast was served, the look on his face was that of a boxer saved by the bell. I could tell he was trying to get his intellectual equilibrium back to counter what I admit was a self-conscious effort to knock him off balance and take the offensive early.

He picked at his food, obviously deep in thought, then looked at me and admitted, “I don’t know how I could come up with the answers to those questions.”

I put my hand on his shoulder and said, “Bart, you can’t come up with those answers on your own, and neither could a thousand Einsteins. The only way we can know the answers to those questions is if God Himself told us—what’s known as divine revelation.”

“So you obviously believe that God has spoken through the Bible.”

“Yes.”

Bart then leaned back in his chair and said, “That is a big problem because I don’t believe the Bible is God’s Word any more than I believe that this morning’s newspaper is. Both were written by men who we both know can and do make mistakes. Besides, at least today’s newspaper can be verified by present-day witnesses and other corroborating evidence. Why should I believe a book that is two thousand years old? After all, you are basing everything you believe on the Bible aren’t you?”

I looked at Bart and thought that Jesus must have had similar feelings as He looked at the rich young ruler. On the one hand, I believed that Bart was being sincere in his question; on the other hand, I was saddened by his striking admission of complete skepticism toward God’s Word.

(I give Bart a lot of credit for asking a legitimate question. It’s a question not only to be expected from an unbeliever but seriously contemplated by every believer as well. If you are a believer, let me ask you, “Why do you believe the Bible?” I suspect that most believers have not thought through this question, and if faced with a Bart, would quickly feel cotton in their mouths. It’s one thing to know what you believe; it’s another thing altogether to know why you believe it.)

I took a deep breath and affirmed the legitimacy of Bart’s question. “Bart, you have raised a great question that reveals more about the differences we have than you think. I appreciate you giving me the opportunity to answer a question that will take us even farther down the road than I had hoped for at this meeting. Do you have the time for a very thorough answer?”

He laughed. “I only have an hour.”

“Then you just committed to another meeting, because an hour won’t be enough time.”

“Seriously?” he said.

I was deadly serious, and you’ll see why as I unfold to you my response to Bart over our next two meetings. I began by explaining the concept of a worldview, which is foundational to dealing with any essential question.

First, everybody has a worldview. Everybody has a set of assumptions and presuppositions that determine the way they look at the world, their place in the world, and what they think in the world is really important. Regardless of your creed, religion, faith, or lack thereof, you bring to the table certain preconceived beliefs and codes that affect your view of truth, morality, and life itself.


Everybody looks at this world through certain assumptions and presuppositions, some provable, some nonprovable. The Christian cannot prove that God exists, but the atheist cannot prove that God doesn’t. Both worldviews are based on faith.

Second, there are only two basic worldviews—the Christian worldview and the non-Christian worldview. These worldviews are radically different at practically every point. Whether it is answering questions such as:

Why is there something rather than nothing?
How do you explain human nature?
How do you determine what is right and wrong?
How do you know that you know?
What happens to a person at death?
the Christian worldview gives answers radically different from every other non-Christian worldview.

Third, every worldview is based on faith. Everybody looks at this world through certain assumptions and presuppositions, some provable, some nonprovable. The Christian has a worldview based on the belief that God exists. The atheist has a worldview based on the belief that God doesn’t. The Christian cannot prove that God exists, but the atheist cannot prove that God doesn’t. Both worldviews are based on faith. The question is, which worldview has the strongest evidence to support the faith of its adherents?

Fourth, every worldview is only as valid as the evidence it is based upon. When answering essential questions, this concept must be kept in mind. It is at this point that the so-called “culture wars” are being waged. Chuck Colson put it this way: “The culture war is not just about abortion, homosexual rights, or the decline of public education. These are only skirmishes. The real war is a cosmic struggle between worldviews—between the Christian worldview and the various secular and spiritual worldviews arrayed against it.” 

The first Sunday I was away at college, I attended a church and went to the small group (it was called Sunday school back then) for college students. As soon as the class started, a man got up without saying a word and wrote three questions on a chalkboard:

Who am I?
Why am I here?
Where am I going?
Mr. West would repeat that task every Sunday and then challenge us with some thought-provoking comments. After the first couple of Sundays, he arrested my attention with this declaration: “One word will determine what we believe and why we believe it. That word is truth.”

Which worldview is true? Better, which worldview gives the right answers to those questions? If we are unable to answer those questions correctly, we have no discernible purpose or meaning to life.

The Christian worldview goes beyond all other worldviews in one crucially important respect: It asserts not just truth but ultimate eternal truth. The Christian worldview provides answers for the three key themes that alone tell us what is wrong with the world and how it can be made right again, namely, creation, fall, and redemption.

The doctrine of creation tells us we are not evolutionary accidents. We are a direct creation of the Creator of the universe. Practically all other worldviews deny this concept.

At the same time, it is obvious something is wrong with this God-created world; either God blew it or this is not exactly the world God created. The Christian worldview tells us the problem is the introduction of sin into the world by the fall of mankind in the Garden of Eden. Sin has corrupted the entire human race as well as the physical world we live in. The non-Christian view invariably denies that sin has anything to do with our problem.

Finally, the Christian worldview tells us redemption is the only solution to the problem. We need a Savior to remedy the sin problem and to give mankind a new heart and a new mind that is truly centered on God. The non-Christian worldview denies the need for personal redemption at all.


To many non-Christians, the Bible is no more than an antiquated collection of myths and fables. To others it is a good book, but it is not God’s book.

If you are a believer reading this, then I know I am singing to the choir. But if you are a Bart, or even a nominal Christian, your question still remains, “But you get this view from only one source—the Bible—so why believe the Bible as opposed to any other truth source, religious writing, or human reasoning?”

I concede it is not only a fair question but an inflammatory one given today’s culture.

Most of this world denies that it is important to believe the Bible or even to consider it anything other than just another book. Recently, the Colorado Supreme Court threw out the sentence of a man given the death penalty because jurors consulted the Bible in reaching a verdict. The court said this constituted an improper outside influence and a reliance on a “higher authority.”  The Supreme Court of Colorado was saying in essence it is improper to consult the Bible because it is just another book.

To many non-Christians, the Bible is no more than an antiquated collection of myths and fables. To others it is a good book, but it is not God’s book. On the other hand, two billion people, roughly one-third of this world’s population, claim to believe in the God of this book and to believe this is the book God wrote. Even the men who wrote it believed they were writing the very words of God.


Jesus Christ made the ultimate statement concerning any word inspired by God’s Spirit when He said to the Father: “Your word is truth.”

The biggest challenge to unbelievers—and their biggest objection to the Bible—is that it claims to be not just the words of men, but the Word of God. In the Old Testament alone, phrases such as, “God said” or “God spoke” or “the Word of the Lord came” occur nearly four thousand times (seven hundred times in the first five books, forty times in one chapter). Hundreds of years later, the apostle Paul said this about the Bible: “All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right” (2 Timothy 3:16 nlt).

Yet Jesus Christ made the ultimate statement concerning any word inspired by God’s Spirit when He said to the Father: “Your word is truth.” 

Now don’t miss the tremendous amount of ground Jesus covered with this statement. Jesus was not just stating that the Bible speaks truth. He was stating that this book is the very essence of truth and the standard by which all other “truth” is to be measured. Furthermore, this statement was made in a prayer Jesus was offering to God the Father. He was calling this word God’s Word. This book is God’s Word because it is truth and it is truth because it is God’s Word. But if this statement is true, there should be compelling reasons to believe the Bible is not just reliable truth but divine truth.


My father taught me that “a man is no better
than his word.” Well, neither is God, and He is perfectly willing to lay His reputation on the line behind the veracity of His Word.

Put another way, a book truly written by God Himself should bear certain verifying marks and evidence that would confirm a divine imprint on its contents. Why? Because God will be judged by His words just as we are by ours. Think of how my skills as a writer, thinker, and researcher will be judged by those who read this book. Beginning with my editor, then my proofreaders, then my publisher, and finally my readers, this book will always be a reflection of me. How much more is God’s Word a reflection of His character, nature, and reliability? Perhaps that is why we read in the book of Psalms:

for you have exalted above all things
your name and your word.

My father taught me early in life “a man is no better than his word.” Well, neither is God, and He is perfectly willing to lay His reputation on the line behind the veracity of His Word. But we should have solid reasons for believing that the Bible is God’s very word(s), and here are four reasons to support this claim.

The Bible Is Historically Reliable

What would happen if you chose ten different people from the same city to write a book about one controversial topic, such as the meaning of life? Now add these parameters: they share the same culture, same educational level, and the same language, but they are separated from each other, never allowed to talk to or consult each other. What are the chances that what they wrote would be in total agreement? You and I both know the chance of that happening would be zero.

Now imagine a book that is actually sixty-six books in one, written over a period of fifteen hundred years by forty different authors living on three different continents (Europe, Africa, and Asia), writing in three different languages (Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic) on many controversial topics, and yet all concentrating on one basic theme and all being in perfect agreement on their theological conclusions.


Nobody can prove or disprove what has
taken place in the past. All one can
do is present the evidence.

Would you expect there to be a literary symmetry from beginning to end with the last book being written well over a thousand years after the first one? Consider this: Genesis, the first book of the Bible, begins in a garden in paradise. In the middle of that garden are the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. When you go to the last book of the Bible, Revelation, written some fifteen hundred years later, you end up again in the paradise of God and there once again is the tree of life “for the healing of the nations.”  In Genesis, man is driven out of the garden because of his sin and to keep him from eating of the tree that would have sealed his physical and spiritual death. In Revelation, he is invited to partake of the tree that symbolizes his eternal life and the removal of the curse. In Genesis, a river flows from the garden. In Revelation, a river flows from the throne of God. The golden thread that runs from Genesis to Revelation is the theme of redemption through blood sacrifice: lambs in the Old Testament and the lamb of God in the New Testament.

But how do we know that all that the Bible says actually happened? How do we know it is fact not fable? How do we really know there was a Moses and a Red Sea crossing? How do we know there was a Goliath that David killed? How do we know there was a Daniel in the lion’s den? How do we know there was a Jesus, who died on a cross and came out of a tomb three days later? What reasons do we have to believe the Bible?

Admittedly, nobody can prove or disprove what has taken place in the past. All one can do is present the evidence. I can’t prove there actually was a man named George Washington who served as the first president of the United States. All I can do is present the evidence. Here we need to keep two things in mind:

The trustworthiness of any ancient historical account is based on the evidence for that account.
The evidence must come from ancient documents and manuscripts. All ancient history is based on documentary evidence. Remember, DVDs, videos, televisions, and tape recorders didn’t exist a hundred years ago.
Furthermore, critics love to point out that we don’t have access to any of the original documents penned by the biblical authors. We don’t have the original manuscripts that were first written when all these things took place. So how do we know we have the right stuff    ? How do we know Jesus even existed? How do we know we are reading actual historical events not made up myths? We are relying on accounts two to three millennia old. Well, to these critics we can enthusiastically say, “Glad you asked!”

Have you ever heard of Julius Caesar? Ever read the writings of Plato? Studied Homer’s Iliad? Have you ever heard of anyone questioning the existence of any of those historical figures? Any professor of literature ever declare that Caesar was no more real than Mickey Mouse or that the Iliad really wasn’t written by Homer? Not lately…probably not ever.


The number of manuscripts we have supporting the New Testament alone is almost forty times the number of manuscripts supporting the writings
of Julius Caesar, Plato, and Homer combined.

Yet these assumed to be actual historical figures and literary works have relatively shaky authentication compared to the Bible. Have you ever thought about how many copies or manuscripts we have of the ancient writings of these men and how close in time those documents are to their subject? Have you ever thought about what the time span is between the copies that we do have and the original documents? Let me just give you the manuscript evidence for the ancient writings for these three historical figures.

Julius Caesar—earliest manuscripts one thousand years after Caesar lived; only ten manuscripts exist.

Plato—earliest manuscripts thirteen hundred years after Plato lived; only 7 manuscripts exist.

Homer—earliest manuscripts five hundred years after Homer lived; 643 manuscripts exist. Homer’s Iliad has the best manuscript support of any ancient text in the world next to the Bible.

Now consider this—there are over 24,000 partial and full Greek manuscripts of the New Testament, the earliest one dating from just thirty five years after the book of Revelation was written. The number of manuscripts we have supporting the New Testament alone is almost forty times the number of manuscripts supporting the writings of the aforementioned historical figures combined. And the earliest manuscripts are just one generation removed from the oldest New Testament book.

What about the Old Testament (which as you could guess is much older than the New Testament)? Recently I was in Qumran at the site of the discovery of the Dead Sea Scrolls. Fragments of almost every book in the Old Testament were found in these scrolls dated approximately 150 BC, only two hundred years after the last event of the Old Testament took place.

No other book from the ancient world has as much manuscript support or is as closely tied to the original event as the Bible.

Putting together all of these manuscripts and comparing them with the version of the Bible we have today, we now know that we have at least 99.5 percent of what would be considered the original document. No other ancient historical source can make that claim. But Bart still needed to ask, “How do we know they got their history right?” It is one thing to accurately record something, but that does not prove the veracity of the thing recorded.

If I read a history book that says Custer’s Last Stand took place at Yankee Stadium while he was eating a chili dog in 1998, I would be disinclined to believe that history book. The number of manuscripts verifying the accuracy of the transmission of that account would be irrelevant. However, we have a tool to verify the historical accuracy of a document, and that tool is archaeology.

There are hundreds of examples of how archaeology has confirmed the Bible, and entire books have been written on this one subject. I will give you just one. You probably have heard the story of how Joshua “fought the battle of Jericho and the walls came tumbling down.” For many years liberal critics denigrated this story as completely fabricated for several reasons. First, walls don’t just fall down flat because someone walks around them. Second, the Israelites could not have marched around that city seven times in one day because the city was too large. In many academic circles, the light of this story had been eclipsed by the facts on the ground.


It is illogical to think that the God who created
a universe that operates according to the
scientific principles He built into it would not
communicate in a scientifically accurate way.

Then Professor John Garstang, a British archaeologist, excavated the site of ancient Jericho and discovered that the walls of the city had fallen so completely that the attackers were able to climb up and over the ruins into the city. Why was that so unusual? Because the evidence showed the walls had collapsed outward. Walls do not fall outward; when they are attacked, they fall inward. But in this case just the opposite occurred—just as the book of Joshua records.

I recently visited this ancient site for the seventeenth time. Jericho is actually smaller than the seventy acres my church sits on. I could walk around Jericho seven times in one morning and then go play golf before lunch. It was entirely possible for the people of Israel to march around this city much more than seven times in one day.

This one illustration is just the tip of the iceberg of the incredible archaeological confirmation of the Bible’s veracity. Dr. Nelson Glueck, by consensus the greatest modern authority on Israeli archaeology, said, “No archeological discovery has ever controverted a biblical reference…archeology continues to confirm a clear outline or in exact detail historical statements in the Bible.”

As Jesus said, “Your word is truth.”

The Bible Is Scientifically Correct

The Bible is not a science book, but if it is true and if it is God’s Word, then just as you expect it to be historically reliable, you would expect it to be scientifically accurate. It is illogical to think that the God who created a universe that operates according to the scientific principles He built into it would not communicate in a scientifically accurate way. Another striking evidence that this book is divine truth and God’s Word is that many of the principles of modern science were recorded as facts of nature in the Bible long before any scientist ever confirmed them.

Years ago many believed that the world was flat. Columbus had to overcome this popular opinion in order to finance the voyage that led to his discovery of America. Columbus was convinced as he sailed from Spain that he not only would not “sail over the edge” but that he would eventually find his way back to Spain. He wrote in his diary: “For the execution of the voyage to the Indies, I did not make use of intelligence, mathematics or maps. It is simply the fulfillment of what Isaiah had prophesied.” What prophecy from Isaiah was Columbus referring to?

He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,
and spreads them out like a tent to live in.

Columbus was convinced that the world was a circle, not flat, and that there was no danger at all of “sailing off the sea.” It never occurred to him that Scripture would be scientifically unreliable.


Thirty percent of the Bible consists of prophecy,
and not one of its prophecies has ever
been shown to be false.

Take the science of meteorology. You would expect the Master Meteorologist to know far more than your television weatherman. Years ago scientists thought that winds blew always in a straight direction. Of course, meteorologists now know that wind travels within circuits called “jet streams.” God’s Word spoke of them before Christ was born:

Blowing toward the south,
Then turning toward the north,
The wind continues swirling along;
And on its circular courses the wind returns.

Until fairly recent times, doctors saw no need for washing their hands. Many people died from the hands of doctors themselves because they carried on those hands the very germs that would infect and kill their patients. Later, doctors began to wash their hands in still water, but the mortality rate remained high from infection caught from the very doctor who was trying to bring healing. Today, any doctor will tell you always to wash hands in running water to make sure the germs are washed away. Where did that lifesaving medical idea come from? “Now when the man with the discharge becomes cleansed from his discharge, then he shall count off for himself seven days for his cleansing; he shall then wash his clothes and bathe his body in running water and will become clean.”

We now know that our first president, George Washington, died from a combination of pneumonia worsened by severe blood loss. The blood loss came from a common cure for many serious illnesses in the day—attaching leeches to the skin of the patient to “bleed” the illness out of the body. Usually the opposite effect happened: the patient would die from losing blood, the greatest source of energy and infection fighting power his body had. If only doctors had taken this verse seriously from a medical standpoint: “For the life of a creature is in the blood.”

As Jesus said “Your word is truth.”

The Bible Is Prophetically Accurate

I would be hard-pressed to deny the veracity of the Bible just because of its incredible prophetic content and accuracy. No other book on this planet can match the Bible’s staggering accuracy in foretelling events. Thirty percent of the Bible consists of prophecy, and not one of its prophecies has ever been shown to be false.

Many of the prophecies of Scripture are so specific and so detailed they demand an exact fulfillment. Jesus Himself fulfilled at least forty-eight different prophecies concerning everything from His lineage to His birth, death, and resurrection. The odds of any one person doing that would be one in ten to the 157th power.


God’s truth should go beyond
accuracy; it must be transforming.

Not only that, many prophecies predicted extraordinary events, such as a virgin birth. In hundreds of instances, the fulfillment of the prophecy did not take place until after the prophet had already died.

In the Old Testament alone, over two thousand prophecies have already come to pass. Nothing vaguely resembles this in any other book in the world. Twenty-six books claim to be divine Scriptures like the Bible, but not one of those volumes has any specific predictive prophecies.

The Bible even does something unparalleled in any other literary work. It gives detailed predictions concerning entire countries, some of which are being fulfilled in the twenty-first century. One such fascinating example came to my attention.

At one time, Egypt was the greatest nation in the entire world. It was the king of nations. It was the richest country on earth. In one prophecy about Egypt, the prophet Ezekiel said, “There shall no longer be a prince from the land of Egypt.”

Until a few decades ago, before Egypt adopted a more democratic form of government, a prince always ruled her. But during the nearly twenty-five hundred years between this prophecy and Egypt’s change to its present form of government, none of its princes were Egyptian. That would be like prophesying today that an American will never again be president of the United States and then having twenty-five hundred years go by with no American president.

How could anybody have predicted something like that? Only God could, who knows everything that will happen before it occurs and whose predictions become, by necessity, commands that must be obeyed.

As Jesus said, “Your word is truth.”

The Bible Is Personally Transforming

Even if you have bought what I have been selling in this chapter, I still have one other thing to point out about the world’s bestselling book that should motivate believing it above all else. When I say the Bible is true, I mean the Bible is factual—it accurately records historical events. It is scientifically true—one should never worry about established scientific fact contradicting spiritual truth. It is prophetically true—it predicts many events that happened exactly as prophesied.

But God’s truth should go beyond accuracy; it must be transforming. Something can be true and factual, but have no personal, spiritual significance. I can tell you the truth about how many buttons I have on the shirt I’m wearing right now, but who gives a rip? When I talk about the Bible being true, I mean it is transformationally true—it is capable of bringing about personal, spiritual, and eternal change in one’s life.

Years ago I was pastoring a church in Laurel, Mississippi, and I had just finished preaching a sermon on the reality of hell (don’t hear many of those any more). Afterward a man came up to me and asked if he could see me in my office. After we sat down, he asked, “Do you really believe what you preached today?” I assured him I did. He then asked if I really cared whether people went to hell or not, and slightly miffed, I affirmed that I did. He then said, “Good. I want you to promise me you will go talk to my wife.” I told him I would be glad to. He made me promise again, to my great irritation, that I would. He then said with a sly gotcha grin, “You need to know two things about Diane—she is an atheist and she hates preachers. But you promised you would go.”

I left my office feeling as if I had just been suckered into buying some beachfront property in Phoenix, Arizona. Nevertheless, on the following Tuesday night, Teresa and I made our way out to a doublewide trailer in 95 degree heat with all of the enthusiasm of facing a colonoscopy. (Now that I have had two, that is exactly how I felt.) We walked up to the door and were greeted by a lady wearing her hair in a bun, looking at us through thick black glasses with a scowl as menacing as a mother bear whose cubs have just been threatened.

“Who are you and what do you want?” she demanded.

I wanted to say “Avon calling,” but instead I introduced us and said, “I’m the pastor of Highland Church and wanted to know if we could come in and visit with you.”

“I’m an atheist and I hate preachers,” she spat out with more than a little venom.

“I know,” I said. “I’ve heard so much about you. But seeing as how we drove ten miles out here in this hot weather, could we have ten minutes of your time?”

“I’ll give you two.”

I decided to forego the usual ice-breaking small talk and jumped in: “Diane, do you know for sure when you die you will go to heaven?”

“I told you I’m an atheist. I don’t even believe in heaven—and I know there is no God.”

Praying hard and thinking fast, I said, “Diane, I don’t believe you are an atheist.”

“Why not?”

“Let me ask you a question. Do you know everything there is to know about everything?”

“No, of course not.”

“Would you say you know half of everything there is to know about everything?”

“No.”

“Well, let’s just pretend you do. Would you agree that in that body of knowledge you do not possess, God could exist?”

“Wow! I never thought about that. Well, to be honest, I don’t know there is no God. I’m just not sure whether there is or not.”

“Now we’re getting somewhere. You’re not an atheist, you’re an agnostic.”

She smiled triumphantly. “Yes, that’s what I am, an agnostic.” (I didn’t tell her the Latin word for ‘agnostic’ was ‘ignoramus’—I didn’t think that would move things along in a positive fashion.)

“Now, are you an honest agnostic or a dishonest agnostic?”

“What do you mean?” she said through a puzzled look.

“Well, an honest agnostic says, ‘I don’t know whether there is a god or not, but I’m willing to find out.’ A dishonest agnostic says, ‘I don’t know whether there is a god or not, and I don’t want to know.’ Which one are you?”

“Well…I guess I’m an honest agnostic.”

I asked her to wait in her chair. I went out to my car and brought her a New Testament. “This is a Bible. I want you to begin reading the Gospel of John, and I want you to read one chapter a day. After you’ve read each chapter, I want you to ask yourself two questions: Who did Jesus claim to be, and what am I going to do about it?”

She gasped. “I don’t believe one thing in the Bible.”

“Then it will do you no harm to read it. John has 21 chapters, so it’ll take you three weeks to read it. You won’t hear from me for three weeks. After you’ve finished, with your permission Teresa and I will come back and see where you are in your spiritual pilgrimage.”

I then bid her goodbye as Teresa and I got up to leave.

“Wait!” she almost screamed. “I don’t believe the Bible.”

“I don’t care,” I said nonchalantly as I got in my car. “See you in three weeks.”

This was Tuesday. On Sunday morning after I preached, I gave an altar call for people who wanted to commit themselves to Christ. To my palpable shock, here came Diane down the aisle smiling broadly as she reached out her hand to me. Showing my great faith in the transforming power of the Bible, I clumsily asked, “Why have you come?”

With a smile as bright as a full moon on a clear night, she said,” I want to be baptized and join this church.”

“Diane, you can’t do that until you’ve trusted Christ as your Lord and Savior.”

“I have.”

“When?”

“Wednesday morning.”

“But…”

She giggled. “I didn’t get past the first chapter.”

That evening I baptized Diane, and she became one of the most committed and faithful members of our church.

I could tell you of many more like Diane, individuals such as Pravera, who recently came to our church and told me over breakfast how he was converted to Christ from Hinduism by closeting himself with the Bible, reading it from cover to cover, and concluding that Jesus was who He claimed to be. Pravera trusted Christ on his own in his bedroom. This world has billions of people whose lives have been eternally transformed by hearing the Bible preached or reading it on their own and believing. I challenge anyone to show me any religious work ever written that has such transformational power.

Our second president, John Adams, put it best when he wrote in his diary. “Suppose a nation in some distant region should take the Bible for their only law book and every member should regulate his conduct by the precepts there exhibited!…What a utopia, what a paradise would this region be.” 

In the end, there is one essential question about the Bible: Does it express our ideas about God or God’s ideas about us? Is it God’s Word to us or our words about God? Everybody on this planet has to make a decision. There are many sacred writings and religious books all saying different things about God, heaven, hell, creation, sin, redemption, and salvation. When it comes to these varying truth claims, there can be only two options. Option 1: they are all wrong. Option 2: only one is right.

Perhaps the Bible could be just a bunch of myths and fairy tales, but the overwhelming evidence suggests otherwise. Some other religious book may be the real truth and the Bible could be totally wrong but again the evidence indicates the Bible can more than stand on its own against all other religious authorities combined.

John Wesley, the founder of the Methodist Church, spoke best when he said, “I am a creature of a day. I am a spirit come from God and returning to God. I want to know one thing: the way to heaven. God Himself has condescended to teach me the way. He has written it down in a book. Give me that book! At any price give me the Book of God. Let me be a man of one book—this book, the Bible.” 

No, Bart is still not convinced, but it has nothing to do with the evidence. As I said to him recently, “I have decided I am going to go with the man who came back from the dead, who said, ‘Your word is truth.’ I am going with the Bible.”

Setting Boundaries™ with Difficult People by Allison Bottke

Tour Date: Tuesday, October 4

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It is time for a FIRST Wild Card Tour book review! If you wish to join the FIRST blog alliance, just click the button. We are a group of reviewers who tour Christian books. A Wild Card post includes a brief bio of the author and a full chapter from each book toured. The reason it is called a FIRST Wild Card Tour is that you never know if the book will be fiction, non~fiction, for young, or for old...or for somewhere in between! Enjoy your free peek into the book!

You never know when I might play a wild card on you!


Today's Wild Card author is:


and the book:


Setting Boundaries™ with Difficult People

Harvest House Publishers (October 1, 2011)

***Special thanks to Karri | Marketing Assistant, Harvest House Publishers for sending me a review copy.***

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:


Allison Bottke is the author of Setting Boundaries™ for Your Adult Children and the general editor of the popular God Allows U-Turns® series and the God Answers Prayer series. She has written or edited more than 20 nonfiction and fiction books. Allison is in frequent demand as a speaker and has been featured on The 700 Club, Decision Today, and numerous other radio and television programs. Visit her at www.AllisonBottke.com or www.SanitySupport.com.


SHORT BOOK DESCRIPTION:

Continuing her popular Setting Boundaries series, Allison Bottke offers her distinctive “Six Steps to SANITY” to readers who must deal with difficult people.

S…Stop your own negative behavior
A…Assemble a support group
N…Nip excuses in the bud
I…Implement rules and boundaries
T….Trust your instincts
Y…Yield everything to God

Whether it’s a family member, coworker, neighbor, or friend, readers who have allowed others to overstep their boundaries will learn how to take back their life…for good.

Setting Boundaries with Difficult People is designed to inspire, empower, and equip readers with the tools to transform lives.

Product Details:

List Price: $12.99
Paperback: 240 pages
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers (October 1, 2011)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0736926968
ISBN-13: 978-0736926966

AND NOW...THE FIRST CHAPTER:


Keeping Your Eye on the Goal

Runners who enter the Boston Marathon know that to successfully complete the race, they will have to run 42.195 kilometers (26 miles and 385 yards). No one who shows up at the starting line is unsure of the distance he or she will have to run. Likewise, we need to know our goals in relating to the difficult people in our lives. And we need to know that achieving our ultimate goal may require that we accomplish several supplementary goals along the way.

One marathoner said, “After a scare with my heart, I entered the race mostly to get in better physical shape. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to run the entire 26 miles, but I knew the training would help.” Another runner gave this reason for entering: “I needed to lose 60 pounds—that’s really why I entered the race. If I reached that goal before race day and never ran, I would have succeeded.” Another said, “I was recovering from knee surgery, and my underlying goal was to increase flexibility and strength in my legs. The race was the catalyst that kept me going, but it wasn’t my ultimate goal.”

In other words, even though these athletes’ goal was to run 26.2 miles, they each had supplementary goals leading up to race day that were every bit as important.

Our Ultimate Goal

When setting boundaries with difficult people, the ultimate goal is to achieve freedom from the bondage of drama, chaos, and crisis that often accompanies challenging relationships. Whether those relationships are with difficult people, adult children, aging parents, teens, or perhaps even food, we need to keep our eye on that ultimate goal of freedom. We also need to understand that breaking free from anything requires hard work, and that means commitment, consistency, and consequences.

Remember too that our emotions will beg for attention when other peoples’ hurtful behavior pushes our buttons. We have all developed our own coping responses as a result of our life experiences. For some of us, these coping responses lead to self-defeating, unhealthy life patterns that we repeat throughout our lives, and they act as roadblocks to freedom. When life situations trigger emotional responses, addressing our feelings is going to be a key factor in reaching our goal.

Our Supplementary Goals

As we work toward our ultimate goal, we want to accomplish several other goals as well: We want…

to stop difficult people from hurting us
to take control and stop the stress
to become healthy and whole
to gain clarity in our lives
to learn new skills to enhance our relationships
to live lives that are pleasing to God
to find SANITY
Two Growth Options

Setting healthy boundaries isn’t something we learn one time and then never have to think about it again. It’s not like tying our shoes or riding a bike—processes we learn and then simply repeat the same way time after time with the same results. For many of us, setting boundaries is not that easy. But it doesn’t have to be as problematic as we often make it.

Bestselling author and radio talk-show host Dr. Laura Schlessinger says we have two options when dealing with people who have caused us harm—real or imagined: “Either stand up for yourself—or move on. Those are the only two means of growth.”  

That sounded a bit cut-and-dry to me when I first read it. Surely there are more than two options that will help us grow. Yet the more I thought about her statement, the more sense it made. Yes, there are a lot more options, but only if we want to remain stuck or stagnant. If we truly want to move forward (that is, if we want to grow) when someone has hurt us, Dr. Laura is right. We either stand up (speak up) or move on (shake it off    ). There really isn’t anything else to do that initiates growth.

Standing up for yourself doesn’t mean bulldozing your way over someone who has behaved poorly or has made choices that hurt you. Likewise, moving on doesn’t mean glossing over a problem, ignoring it, or denying that something is wrong.

Both standing up and moving on are conscious decisions we must make. Learning how to stand up or move on is a vital part in gaining SANITY.

A Lesson Learned

I was sitting on the outdoor patio at a local restaurant with several friends on a beautiful fall day, enjoying good food and great conversation. I’d just spent several weeks completing a challenging project in my writing cave, and I was truly savoring this time of refreshing calm. A young man walked by, recognized one of my friends, and stopped to chat. There was an empty chair at our table, and my friend invited Ted to sit down and visit with us. Ted had just completed a master’s degree program, but this day he was dressed in the uniform of the times: shorts, ball cap, flip-flops, and a T-shirt that declared he loved a certain restaurant whose name had nothing whatsoever to do with owls.

Attractive, articulate, and clearly extroverted, Ted would have been a breath of fresh air—had it not been for his extensive use of profanity, particularly the f word. It was like he needed the word to inhale air and move on to his next thought. Every other word from Ted was profane, and I found myself cringing at each new onslaught. I felt as if I were being verbally slapped in the face, aurally assaulted with every sentence. After a while, turning the other cheek wasn’t working, and what had been a beautiful day quickly soured into an increasingly uncomfortable situation.

I’m far from a prude, but these days very few of my friends or business associates use such off-color language. Nor do I. That had not always been the case, and I’d worked long and hard to make this change in my own life. I’m sure this made me even more sensitive to this issue.

Could I have simply allowed this young man’s crude language to roll off my shoulders, realizing I would most likely never see him again? Yes. But in that instant I also realized that if I truly believed in God and trusted His Word, I had to believe He placed me in this position for a reason, and I asked myself if the reason was to learn how to keep my mouth shut or to learn how to communicate rationally and perhaps be a light in this young man’s world. (Just so you know, the keeping my mouth shut option is a lesson God frequently teaches me, so I really had to pray hard about this as I sat there.)

In Dr. Laura’s words, would I stand up, or would I move on?

I’ll admit I’m not always good at being calm and thoughtful. Sometimes my words come out far more caustic than I intend them to. Years ago, I probably would have resorted to sarcasm. (“Do you eat with that mouth?”) But on this occasion, I asked God to calm my spirit and give me words that would allow me to set a boundary that would be helpful to Ted, to me, and perhaps to the others present as well.

Feeling convicted that I needed to speak up, I took a deep breath as I said something along these lines:

“It’s really nice to hear someone so passionate about life, but could I ask you a question?”

“Sure,” he said with a smile.

Looking directly at him, I was careful to keep my voice calm and kind. I didn’t want to sound angry or judgmental. I was about to confront him, but I didn’t want this to be confrontational. Please, Lord, give me the right words.

“I’m wondering if you’re aware how much you swear and how offensive that might be for some people? It’s actually making me uncomfortable, as if I were being slapped over and over again. I’ve been sitting here trying to figure out whether I should say something. You seem like a smart guy, gifted and good-looking, so you obviously don’t need to talk like that, and it doesn’t do you justice. I’m kind of out of touch with young people today—is that generally how your friends talk? I just wondered.”

Then, I did what I couldn’t have done without God’s help. I stopped talking and prayed that God would make Himself known.

My heart was pounding, and my friends’ jaws dropped at my boldness. This could have gone any number of ways, not all of them good, but to this young man’s credit, he sincerely apologized, clearly sorry that he’d offended me and put a damper on my day. This led to a wonderful conversation about words and their meanings (something very dear to me), and then we talked about effectively setting healthy boundaries verbally. We eventually got around to a spirited discussion about faith. The entire situation turned into what I call a God-cidence moment, and I’d like to think all of us left that day with something to ponder about God’s purpose for our lives and why He places us in situations that test our mettle. And all of this happened because I spoke up and set a boundary about using profanity.

I had the choice to stand up or move on, and I chose to stand up in a way that I felt was pleasing to God. Was I afraid? Yes—but not that what I was doing was wrong. I was only afraid that I wouldn’t say the right words and would miss the opportunity God had provided.

The Moment Is Now

On Palm Sunday at Harvest Church in Watauga, Texas, pastor Chuck Angel challenged those of us in the pews to find the courage to open the door to change and choice. Here are a few of the copious notes I took when I wasn’t shouting “Amen!”

When opportunity knocks, we need to have courage to overcome fear. There’s a difference between understanding what you should do and choosing to do it. The tipping point takes us from knowing what we ought to do to making the decision to act.

God will direct our paths, but He won’t take the step for us. Some of us will stop on the journey. It’s not just knowing—it’s going. Often, there is a gap in the middle between knowing and going.

Life is a parade of “now” moments, not a series of tomorrows. No future moment is more significant than now.

Confronting the Difficult People in Our Lives

Those of us with difficult people in our lives need to learn to stand up and confront them (or our own issues) or to move on. We need courage to walk through doors to freedom. Simply identifying that a door exists isn’t enough; we need the courage to walk through it.

Is this your “now” moment?

The SANITY Goal

For me, the journey to setting healthy boundaries has been rocky. Years ago, I’d reached the end of my rope (yet again) with my adult son, Chris, but this time something was different—this time I turned solely to my Bible, crying out to God not only for wisdom and discernment but also for clear answers to a situation that was continually breaking my heart. Chris was in jail (yet again), and for the first time I felt a powerful conviction that it was time for both of us to start a new life journey. For some reason, this time, enough really was enough, and things were going to change—I was going to change—regardless of whether Chris changed one iota.

I’ve always been a writer. That’s what I do—it’s how I most often process my life. One day, as I was reading Scripture, writing notes, and pouring my heart out on the pages, God imparted a powerful lesson to me. Personally, I learn best using visuals, acronyms, lists, bullet points, words of affirmation…tools that help me to remember important things. So on this day, in almost no time I had developed six critical actions that I knew I needed to do in my relationship with my son. As I read and reread the pages, an acronym formed, and I wrote this at the top of the page.

“Set boundaries and find SANITY.”

I’m one of the most severely boundary-challenged individuals I know, so it wasn’t a surprise that during this time of seeking answers, God would lay that conviction on my heart. My own boundary-setting backsliding often left tire tracks of poor choices all over my bruised heart. I knew this was a problem I struggled with.

As a sinner who is acutely aware of what it means to be in bondage, my personal goal since making my own U-turn toward God has been to do my best to live a life that is pleasing to Him and to help others find freedom from their painful pasts. The need to set healthy boundaries consistently plays an active role in many areas in my life. However, since stumbling on the Six Steps to SANITY, I’ve found it easier to get back on the horse when I fall off.

The Spiritual Goal

In her book A Woman’s Passionate Pursuit of God, my friend Karol Ladd has written a wonderful study of the New Testament book of Philippians. Written by the apostle Paul while imprisoned in Rome, Philippians is actually a letter to the people of Philippi, teaching early Christians how to experience a true satisfaction of the soul. His story of resilient joy, consistent contentment, and a peace that passes all understanding is one of the most quoted stories in the Bible.

Karol begins her book by weaving together the story of Paul and Silas’s journey to Philippi, recounting the way Lydia was converted, Paul cast demons out of a slave girl, and he and Silas were arrested, beaten, and thrown into a dungeon prison.

Have you ever thought you were following God’s guidance or leading and found yourself in a real mess of a situation? It can tend to make you want to doubt God and question His work in your life. Did I really follow God’s direction? Does He really care about my situation? Why would God allow this to happen to me if I am following His will? The questions are valid, but we will soon see that God often allows the difficulties in our lives for a greater purpose. He will not leave us in the midst of our troubles. The important thing is to learn to react to our situations and challenges with faith and not fear.  

Stories of faith-filled and seemingly fearless men and women abound throughout the Bible. Time after time, these persecuted individuals realized that their power to overcome difficulties came from God and not from themselves. They learned to react to their situations and challenges differently. They chose to look to God. Karol leads us once again to that truth.

We too can learn to turn our eyes upward and have a different response than the rest of the world when it comes to challenges in our life. We are jars of clay with a great and mighty God who is able to bring beauty out of any situation. He will give us the strength we need to endure and persevere through the not-so-perfect places in our lives.  

As we keep our eye on the goal to find freedom from challenging relationships with difficult people, to learn how and when to stand up or move on, let us not forget, as Karol writes, to turn our eyes upward during the journey.

Partners on the Journey

I wondered what setting boundaries with difficult people looks like from different perspectives, so more than a year ago I began to distribute a questionnaire to men and women around the country. I’ll include many of the candid and helpful responses throughout the book. I have changed some of the names to honor respondents’ requests for anonymity.

Also, because I’m a layman in the world of Christian counseling, I invited a professional counselor to join us from time to time, someone who is better experienced therapeutically to help us on the journey. Bernis Riley holds a bachelor of science degree in medical technology from Sam Houston State University and a master of arts degree in counseling from Liberty University. Her major experience is in trauma-related disorders and family therapy. Bernis is a licensed professional counselor and a certified brief strategic family therapist. She is a member of the American Association of Christian Counselors and the Christian Counselors of Texas. Bernis is completing a doctoral program in psychology from California Southern University.

Bernis conducts a thriving private counseling practice called SoulCare in the Dallas–Ft. Worth area of Texas. I asked her how she would describe her work.

Life has a way of handing us problems that we are not prepared to handle. It’s important to remember that you don’t have to face those problems alone. A trusted counselor can help you find peace and hope when you are overwhelmed or confused by the problems you are facing. Counseling can help you overcome the issues you struggle with, like depression, anger, fear, and anxiety. It can also help people out of the chaos of codependency, enabling, and childhood abuse.

As we proceed on the road to setting boundaries with difficult people, Bernis will provide soul-searching questions and helpful tips in a section called “SANITY Support” at the end of each chapter. These supportive points to consider will help you apply what you have learned from each chapter to your life right now. Drawing on her experience as a Christian counselor, Bernis has also provided sample scripts and letters at the end of this book to help you approach the difficult people in your life.

Individual Choices

Learning to understand God’s plan is a lifelong journey that can often take us into uncharted territory. The quest to know our purpose in life has confounded men and women since the beginning of time. Just when we think we’ve got things nailed down, the rug gets pulled out from under us, and we find ourselves looking at our lives from an entirely different perspective. Never is this more true than when it comes to setting healthy boundaries with difficult people in uncomfortable situations.

Some of the boundary choices we face will be life-changing. Yet the monumental choices we make that dramatically change the course of our lives are actually no more important than the individual choices we make in the everyday moments of life. Combined, they make us who we are—a rich tapestry of experience woven together by our choices.

SANITY Support

Purchase an inexpensive spiral notebook or steno pad that will fit in your purse or briefcase. Use it in conjunction with reading this book, starting with the questions below.
Who are the difficult people in your life? With whom are you hesitant to set healthy boundaries?
What keeps you from setting those boundaries?
Which growth action—standing up or moving on—are you willing to take with the difficult people in your life so that you are no longer stuck in neutral?